“Writhing Your Birth Pain”

I read this little bit of advice from Baby Center: “Writing Your Birth Plan” as “Writhing Your Birth Pain”. What is my subconscious up to these days?! Truth be told, I thought it was kind of hilarious at first. Especially since I’ve done pretty much everything to avoid even thinking about the actually labor process. I posted this picture on Facebook and it started an on set of birthing advice from hypnobirthing to c-sections. I absolutely appreciate and value every single opinion and love that so many women are passionate about the birthing process.

You want to know what my ideal birthing process would be, right this very minute?? A non-existent one. Yup, if I’m being completely honest — the idea of pushing a watermelon out of my body does not sound in the least bit appealing, joyful, enjoyable, or exciting. I’m just putting it out there. I am terrified and I think that’s why I’ve completely avoided the subject all together. P.S. Thanks a lot Eve. That girl is going to get so many slaps in the face in heaven.

Part of me truly feels the less options I have, the better. I just need to listen to my doctor/doula and everything will be fine. They are professionals, right? Then another part of me thinks, women have been doing this for years and multiple times so 1) how hard can it be? and 2) my body clearly will know what it’s doing, right? Finally, the type-A person in me wants to spend the next three months really searching all my options and decide on a birth plan that I think would be the best for me.

So, be honest with me people, how many of you totally freaked out with your first/second/third/millionth? What did you do to calm the anxiety and how did you get started on your process of looking into birth plans? Was your birth plan followed? Did it give you peace-of-mind or racing-of-the-heart?

Looking forward to all your answers,
Leelo and the giant squash baby slowly growing bigger and bigger inside of her.